Trust me. It's cozy.
So the first week, no one talks -esp after NorthDakota and PopPops got "released" from Underwriter Survivor Island. Then, I think during week 2 people got a little too comfortable, what with going out at night and then FeistySue and TexasRose laughing and being loud about TexasRose's "spirits" consumption the following day; which became a long-running joke. And as we've interacted each day, all serving as each other's captive audience, we've built rapport and developed a lot of "insider" jokes, and generally have gotten along and made the most of our forced time together.
But I think week three is the end of the line.
Or maybe that's just my personal limit for forced togetherness in a small space with strangers. Maybe every one else loves it and plans to visit each other cross country and have slumber parties.
Times I almost got Country this week:
1. When I tried to whisper something quietly to FeistySue-she of PerpetuallyLoudVolume- in the tiny classroom and she basically yells her response to me, and I said to her in a very quiet voice, "Why are you yelling when I'm clearly trying to talk softly with you?" And she yelled, so that now the entire class is pretty much forced to pay attention to us, "THIS IS MY VOICE; THIS HAS BEEN MY VOICE SINCE I WAS A CHILD; I CANNOT WHISPER. EVEN MY SISTER WOULD SAY TO ME WHEN I WAS LITTLE, 'WHY YOU VOICE LIKE THAT?'" To which I reply, in a very quiet, icy, cold, now-pissed-off voice, "It's not your voice I'm objecting to, it's your volume." (She just walked out of the room pseudo-yelling about how this is just her voice and she guesses she just can't keep a secret. Despite my earnest prayers, she did not drop dead in front of us.)
2. *This didn't happen at work but shi*got real during my lunch break that same day. I walked to our hotel next door to our job to use the "business center" in the lobby. The business center is a single computer on the equivalent of dial-up speed. To explain the timing of what I'm about to share, you must understand that when I got to the business center, the computer was available but I had to wait at the front desk for a moment for an employee to be available because I had a question. Then when employee was finally available, I asked if there was a printer attached; and if there was a charge to print. Then, the employee said the printer ink was low; that she'd come shake the ink thingy because "sometimes that helped." Which she proceeded to do. Then after all that I sat down at the computer to work. Someone had left a screen open so I actually went and peeked in outer lobby/front door area to see if anyone had just stepped away to make a call or whatever. Nope. So i closed the screens, and began printing the stuff I needed. Several minutes after that, this generic-juicy-coutoure-wearing biznatch approaches me and says without even a hint of warmth or pleading or manners, "I need to get on and close out of the site i was on." she was very aggressive and entitled and bitchy; her tone was that of the owner of a computer talking to someone who was borrowing her personal computer. So without even looking up, because two can play at the bitchy entitled game and i actually was entitled to be on the computer at that moment, I said, "i exed out of the pages that were open," so then she said, again with an attitude, "well i need to get on and log out of that website." and I said "well i should be done in about five to seven minutes." she said, "well i was on it," which I didn't even dignify with a direct response since we both knew she'd been gone way past the time in which she could pretend it was still her turn. i just repeated myself, without looking up, "well i'll be done in 5 to 7 minutes." she lost her mind and did this elaborate slamming around of the papers she was holding, stomping, sighing, huffing and puffing. naturally, i was thrilled. the stupid thing is that if she would have approached me with one ounce of manners or an appeal to my kindness, i would 100% have given her the computer. it (the computer) was slow to the point of being annoying and i was about ready to give up anyway; not to mention i was doing something non-essential. but once she threw down the gauntlet i was pretty much required by the see-you-and-raise-you-one-bitch-manifesto to hold my ground. so i did. booyah.
3. first paycheck didn't show hourly breakdown, and naturally I wanted to confirm my hours worked vs paid. so i sent an email requesting to see a paystub. they sent me a link to register on some website (adp?) to register for online stubs (is that a thing?);but the link was not valid. and since this was like the 8th version of something like this happening and their responding very cavalierly or with a solution that wasn't valid, I sort of saw red. So I sent a tersely worded email saying i was "frustrated" and that I requested "immediate" resolution; that I did not think it was "appropriate" to have to "chase" down issues like this on the clock next week when I should be trying to "meet or exceed our client's production goals." (a couple hours later my new boss came and helped me figure out how my paycheck worked.)
4. a coworker who i have generally enjoyed REACHED into my open purse, grabbed the snack i had just bought at the vending machine and said (loudly), "Ooooh, you got donuts." is this real life? did this stranger just reach INTO my purse AND make a comment about the contents therein? i. can. not.
5. the one freaking day I decide NOT to walk back to the hotel during my lunch break, and to stay and eat with my coworkers, FeistySue proceeded to eat soup by placing her lips about 2 inches from the cup and then sucking the soup into her mouth through sheer force of will and the power of slurping. It took the last of my reserves not to say something to her.
this helped.
wed night cocktail @ olive garden with the ladies .
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